Week 10 Storytelling: My Life A Teenage Nobody

(The "Teenage Nobody")

My name? It shouldn't matter, it doesn't matter. Not really. I could be anyone couldn't I? I'm just a screwed up kid, living on the wrong side of the railroad tracks.

I had a name once, Daughter. But I threw that all a way.

"You're evil," my mother told me with wet and wavering eyes. "You are a demon."

The thing is? I could not deny her that fact. I was starting to think I really might be.

She tied me down to a chair, you see. She doused me with Holy Water while she shouted bibical quotes at me. She waved a cross in my face a couple of times.

"Why isn't it working, Kali?" She screamed and shook me so hard I could feel my brain hit the sides of my skull.

She took out a lighter, and waved a small metal cross over it, and she pressed it to my skin.

"It's bubbling!" She screamed. "You are resisting the cross!"

(The "Devil Daughter")

 
I screamed and cried, but she didn't stop. I was down there for hours. Or days? Weeks. I don't know. I was on a steady diet of Holy Water and sacramental wafers.

But that's about when I started feeling numb. Pain and pleasure and displeasure were all starting to blend together into a cocktail called Misery.

To add an umbrella onto the cocktail, she took me to the Catholic Church. She walked into the office of Father Wood. She sounded like she was raving mad, screaming about a demonic daughter. Saying she could see horns coming from my head and that my eyes were red.

Okay, she was raving mad about that. Too raving mad for Father Wood.

"We do not do exorcisms anymore, m'am," he said.

"What do you mean you don't 'do exorcisms'?" She yelled. "My daughter is a demon, Father! Cure her!"

He rolled his eyes and he poured oil on my head. He said some bullshit in Latin.

All the bullshit of which my mother cried with happiness.

"We'll have a new life together now, Daughter," she said and smiled as she walked into the front door. Of her house.

I didn't belong there. I didn't go into the front door, no.

I ran.

And then I became a different name, I was called Girlfriend.

Darren was perfect. That's what the problem was. He was too perfect, and I was too perfectly imperfect. For him, and for anyone it seemed.

"Kali," he said. "It's like a switch. One minute you're an angel and the next moment..."

"A devil," I finished for him.

He nodded softly. "I can't anymore. I can't be with you..."

That was when I became empty. It was like someone took an ice cream scooper and scooped out all of my insides. There was nothing in there but poison.

It started my life as a teenage nobody.

Author's Note:
This week I read Chapters 1-9 of Asura: Tale of the Vanguished. This book is basically the Ramayana, expect it is told in the perspective of the Rakshasa (demon) king, Ravana!

I loved the way that this story was written. It is in a first person perspective but very heavily close to that person. We get every thought and sensory details. In fact, the story has very little dialogue or action. Most of it is the reader in Ravana's mind, which I loved!

I know that on many of your stories I comment that you need dialogue and such. But, this story has taught me that there is a time and place for such close introspection in a story.

Thus, this story is a close introspection from my character from my Storybook, My Life As A Teenage Rakshasi!

Reading Diary A: Asura I

Asura: Tale of the Vanquished Pt. I

(Ravana)

Chapters 1-9
Chapter 1:

• "Tomorrow is my funeral"! What a great first line! As a writer, one can never forget the power of having a real hook of a first line!  I mean, right from the start I am wondering how Ravana got in this situation, and how he knows that his funeral will be tomorrow.
• Following is some great, graphic, violent details! It's so visceral. I tend to write dark stories with heavy violence and visceral themes, so this is great inspiration.
• Finally, I love how this chapter is called "The End". How beautifully unorthodox!

Chapter 2.

• Weather, something I forget to add into stories--but oh how it sets the mood!
• I love all of this internal monologue! It could become boring, but it's such strong and vivid writing that it continues to captivate me.
• Some brief backstory, no heavy info dumping--always good.

Chapter 3:

• Asuras are a casteless society.
• A roaming tribe that hunted and traded, settling along river banks and in cities. 
• Too much info dumping here. (Is my literature minor showing yet?
• The title "Purendara" means 'Slayer of Cities'.
• "A defeated race often uses its cultural supremacy to cover the shame of defeat."
• A LOT of backstory on Asuras, may need to come back to this. There is possibly too much to note of.

Chapter 4:

• The mightiest of Asura Kings.
• Finally dialogue and interactions. The first person is nice for a while but we need to get out of Ravana's head
• You know what this whole book reminds me of? It's like an Indian Paradise Lost, with Ravana and The Ramayana instead of Lucifer and the Bible.

Chapter 5:

• "He rambled on," what a great verbal tag.
• More history.
• "Nothing is more commendable than selfishness. A man who thinks of himself alone is the most unlucky person of all."
• Sometimes this book has some amazing lines.
• "Go Ravana, own the world!"
• "Jealousy is the driving force of progress, envy is the motivating force of life."
• "I do not believe in a heaven where you will be given all that you purposely denied yourself in this world."

Chapter 6:

• "I had been fighting this fool's war for the last few years..." Another great opening line.
• A character being honest in its thoughts is always good to do.
• Good description of a battle!

Chapter 7:

• "Lore of the Losers" what a great chapter title! 
• Huge funeral pyres
• "Drunk with succes  
• Battles

Chapter 8:
Chapter 9:  

• Importance of jewelry 
• Tiny flying tigers
• Blood caked on one's face
• Kubera, the money God.
• "The rich did not care who ruled, as long as they were allowed to be rich. The poor could not afford to care and nobody asked their opinion in any case. Only the middle class mattered and any half-witted ruler knows how to pamper them."

Week 9 Storytelling: Home Sweet Hell

"I can't do this anymore," Lukas said.

"Do what?"

"Be with you," he said, messing with his long brown hair.

His words hit me like a bullet straight to the heart. But as quickly as I felt sadness, did I feel an all-consuming rage. It felt like flames licked my skin and my insides.

"You can't leave me!" I screamed.

He started to run from me, but I grabbed his wrist with a strength I didn't know I had. I heard the bones in his wrist break in my hands and he screamed like bloody murder.

"Shut up!" I yelled, and all I could see was fire and flames and fury.

I covered his mouth with my hand, but he thrashed around. I pushed him and his head hit the side of my vanity.

I stood, stunned, looking at Lukas' lifeless body until I felt the ground shake under me.

The floor opened up, spewing flames as it opened up. Out of the flames was a tall boy who didn't look much older than me, I was 18 at the time.

(Hell's Butler)

He wore a tight-fitting black velvet coat and black skinny jeans. He bowed to me, and his messy black hair hung in front of his face. "Hello, madam."

"Who are you?" I asked.

"My name is Damon," he said and straightened his posture. "I'm a butler of sorts."

"Of sorts?"

"You'll see," he said. "Now, if you'll follow me."

He held his white-gloved hand out to me, but I was hesitant to take it.  I looked to Lukas' lifeless body and realized I didn't have a choice. If I didn't go with Damon, I'd be going to jail. I grabbed his hand.

"Very well," he said, and he pulled me into the flames.

We were suddenly in an elevator that had six-hundred and sixty-six floors on it. He pressed the buttons in a certain order and the elevator shot down so fast I fell to the ground. The elevator stopped and he helped me up.

The elevator doors opened up, and we both stepped into what looked like nothing. It was darkness, save for wispy cotton-like things flying through the air..

"Where are we?" I asked.

"Limbo," he said. "For the unbaptised...the pagans...those who don't belong anywhere else."

"Wait--limbo as in...?"

"Yes, as in Hell," he said. "Come now."

I followed him as we got back into the elevator. It went down a floor and the doors opened up.

This place looked like a state fair with all the fried foods and sweets, with a mud pit in the middle. Pigs sat at the food stands, gorging himself with food, and other pigs wallowed in the mug.

"Gluttony," I said.

"Exactly," he said before we got into the elevator again.

"Is there a reason I'm getting a tour of Hell?" I asked, but he didn't reply. He just pressed the next button.

He didn't step out this town. We just watched from the elevator. This looked like a burlesque club, and the audience was filled with beds. I'll spare you the details.

Damon pressed a button and winked at me.

We went down one more floor and he held his hand out. I shrugged and grabbed it, and stepped out of the elevator. It looked like a set from a scripted wrestling match on TV. There was a massive cage in the middle, and an audience surrounded it.

"Here," Damon said.

I turned to Damon and he handed me a sword. "What is this?"

"I showed you the circles above yours so perhaps make you feel better about your new home," he said.

I took the sword.

"Fight, Eva, fight for the rest of your life," he said. "Welcome to the circle of Wrath, your little slice of home sweet Hell."

Author's Note:
This week I read Kali the Mother, which mentioned The Divine Comedy which included The Inferno. I know a lot about The Inferno because I am currently taking a class about it!

In my Storybook, Kali will be visiting the underworld, so I wanted to start world building and make the Underworld that she will go to. This underworld is actually a combination of the world in The Inferno and from the second part of The Divine Comedy: Purgatorio.

My version has more emphasis on the seven deadly sins and has a more modern veneer.

Reading Diary Part A: Kali the Mother

Kali the Mother by Sister Nivedita

(I am reading this before Asura, since my character is named Kali in my Storybook. I wanted to get some research about the actual Kali to supplement my stories with.)

(Kali)

Part A:
1. Concerning Symbols

• Twilight, the space between day and night
• Light through a mask
• Consumed in fire
• Dissolve in an ocean
• Shadows
• The shadow of the soul
• Bringer of sanctity and peace
• Hide and seek

2. The Vision of Siva

• The beauty of snowpeaks and moonlight
• Beauty imagry "the great Mother, were clothed in raiment of green, broidered with birds and flowers and fruits, and veiled in blue, adorned with many jewels"
• More lovely description: "Something white and austere and pure; something compelling quiet; something silent and passionless, and eternally alone."
• Concept of duality. Light and shadow, attraction and repulsion.
• Anthromorphic
• (This isn't quite what I thought it would be.)
• Being the ideal householder, ideal judge, ideal ruler.
• "To him she is all beauty." 

3. Two Saints of Kali

• Othello slays Desdemona 
• The mention of the Divine Comedy was interesting to me. She basically said aid you need to know a lot about Florence and such in order to understand the Divine Comedy, and she's not wrong. I am currently taking a class over the entire Comedy and it really does require a lot of information about medieval Florence, specifically in relation to politics, and there are also many historical figures, mostly classical figures you need to understand as well.
• Her toy is a kite.

Additional Notes about Kali: 

• Goddess of time, creation, change, preservation, and destruction) 
• Goddess of empowerment 
• Mother Goddess 
• Associated with darkness 
• Kali means time, but also means black. 
• Kali will "devour all."

Reading Plan

For the rest of the semester, I will be reading: Asura Tale of The Vanquished by Anand Neelakantan.

(Asura)

Tentative Reading Plan:

Week 9: Chapters 1-9

Week 10: Chapters 10-18

Week 11: Chapters 19-26

Week 12: Chapters 27-36

Week 13: Chapters 37-46

Week 14: Chapters 47-57

Week 15: Chapters 58-end

Week 16: (no reading)

Week 8: Blog Ideas

I've been adding and deleting things from my introduction throughout the semester, so I didn't really have anything to change.

Additionally, I'm happy with how my blog looks with all the features and my theme. So, there really isn't anything to switch up.

I like how my blog is black and red and sort of Gothic looking since most of the stories that I write are dark in tone.

Week 8: Managing Time

I have managed my time some weeks better than others. I do the best when I get work done on Mondays and Wednesdays in between my classes. I need to continue to do that.

Unfortunately, some of those days I get busy and have to do other things.

I also have been struggling with being able to do assignments when they're due, so I have more missing assignments then I would like.

I'm not going to lie, this semester has not been easy for me.

But I need to make time to do the assignments when they are due, and I need to take advantage of extra credit oppurtunities to make up those missing assignments!

I got this! Right...?

(Growth Mindset Memes)

Week 7 Storytelling: The Demon's Deal

(Image Source)

"The Demon's Deal"

I have a boyfriend named Dorian. Well, or at least that's what everyone thinks. There are times that I even convince myself of that truth.

But the truth is that I made Dorian up. One day I drew what the perfect boyfriend would look like, and then I started writing letters to myself from him, and then I wrote letters back to him. The letters were sent and received in a shoebox.

So, when people at school asked me, whenever my family asked me, I told them, "Yes, I have a boyfriend. His name is Dorian!"

I had a story for how we met, how our first kiss went, and even bought presents for me that "he got me."

The problem started whenever people wanted to meet him.

After excuse after excuse I feared that everyone could see through my thin veil of a lie. I desperately did everything I could think of: wishing on shooting stars and 11:11. I hoped fortune cookies wielded good fortune.

I prayed to God, Buddha, anyone who was listening, but nothing worked.

It wasn't even about making him seem alive anymore, no, I wanted Dorian to be alive.

Finally, I turned to the darkness.

It the angels wouldn't help me, perhaps the demons would.

I looked online for a wishing spell. I wrote my fake boyfriend's name on the paper, along with his qualities: black hair, brown eyes, pale skin, freckles, he's sweet, he's thoughtful, but he's confident, he's charismatic.

I burned the paper in the flame of a candle, and whispered, "Dorian. I wish you were real."

Suddenly the flames grew as tall as a person, and in it's place was the boy I had just described.

Dorian scratched the back of his head, and sheepishly grinned. "Hey, Bridget."

"Dorian!" I cried and ran to him, wrapping my arms around him.

He kissed the top of my head, and embraced me. "I'm here."

"Stay here with me, please," I begged.

"What would you give for me?" He asked and suddenly his teeth were fangs, and I felt claws around my body. His hair was no longer black, but snow-white, and his eyes were bright red.

(Belial, the Demon)

I tried to wriggle out of his grasp, but his arms were like iron chains. "Who are you?"

"Some call me Belial, but I am whoever you want me to be," he said and suddenly he turned back into Dorian. "But, for a price."

"What is the price?" I asked.

"Your soul," he said with a wicked grin.

I laughed. He was joking right? This was all some sick joke.

"It's no joke," he said, and smirked. "I will be your Dorian for seven years, after which your soul will be mine."

"Yours for what?"

"For the taking, but thats shouldn't matter, no? Isn't your Dorian more important?" He smiled softly smiled and released me from his embrace.

I was sixteen years old, so I'd be twenty-three when my soul was gone. I didn't even know what I was doing after all that time. I had no plans of college. Besides, maybe I could trick him. Or maybe he was lying.

"Yes," I said.

"We have a deal," he said with a wolfish grin and he held his hand out. I shook his hand and it felt like fire.

For a moment he was the demon again and then he was back to Dorian. My sweet, kind, Dorian, and boyfriend for seven years.

After which, I had no idea what would happen.

***

When he said he'd take my soul, I didn't know it would be like this. I was twisted into someone hint perverted, and something evil.

I became a demon, much like Belial, the demon I made the deal with.

My home was Hell, literally, and I was to spend the eternity making deals with foolish humans. The business in Hell was souls, and I was no longer the customer, I was the sleazy saleswoman.

Author's Note.
This week, I read "Sri Krishna of Dwarka and Other Stories" and it mentioned demons and curses and such. So, I decided to write a story kind of based off of the Faustian myth, which is the age old tale of a deal with a demon, turning sour.

I know, I cut it close, but I was running out of words! I would have liked to see more with Dorian and Bridget, but the word count did not allow. I feel bad for Bridget's fate, but you reap what you sow, right?

Reading Diary A: Mahabharata

"Shri Krishna of Dwarka and Other Stories" by C. A. Kincaid (1920)

(Krishna)

Part A:
Chapter 1:

• Yogmaya, a Goddess. 
• Demon, Kalanemi.
• Having white hair and an incarnation of a serpent, having black hair and being the incarnation of Lord Vishnu.
• Demons!
• A Demon Prince, oh what I can do with that little line! A Demon Prince who is ruthless, and it takes a human to bring back his humanity. A Demon Prince who is in Hell (reading Dante's Inferno lately,) and meets Lilith. Maybe he becomes Lilith's lover. Oh, how I love my romance stories. Or, the Demon Prince is Asmodeous, and I can do a continuation of my story, "A Band of Demons."Of course the Demon Prince will be a teenager, I love writing Young Adult fiction! It's my thing, if you didn't already notice. 
• Setting: a dungeon. Maybe a girl is imprisoned, and the Demon Prince visits the dungeon, to take a prisoner to eat, but he has some connection with her and they fall in L-O-V-E! (The dungeon, what a place to meet a guy at...) (Anime fans: Is it wrong to pick up a girl in a dungeon?)

Chapter 2:

• Giantess
• Having divine strength.
• Arjun Tree

Chapter 3:

• More boyhood adventures... (Boring...) I write Young Adult, not children's books!
• Demon's disguise. What if the Demon Prince disguises as a peasant and that is how he meets a girl. The girl could be a demon peasant, or a human girl. Either way, it ends with love, and probably a kiss!
• A great snake
• Kadamba tree

Chapter 4:

• Setting: a mountain.

Chapter 5:

• More demons!
• A giant bull.
• Attacking with huge horns. (In the story: give the Demon Prince huge horns!)
• Jackals
• Setting: Woods
• A "cruel snare."

Chapter 6:

• Having a curse. A girl or  a guy could make a deal with a Demon Prince, and as most deals with demons go, it goes horribly wrong. (Circa: Faust.)
• A "gallant" Prince. 
• A King falling in love with a "fair girl" that he saves. 
• Item: A crown. 

Chapter 7:

• Young Princes, more words to go towards my YA Demon Prince story!  
• A Golden. Throne. 
• A letter 
• Musicians